for i am a lazy blogger.

It turns out the 40 hours I spend a week in the library do not lend themselves to hilarious and humiliating blog posts.  By which I mean, "I can't top falling off the stacks."
I'm sorry for my lazy blogging, you guys.  But here's a rapid-fire gift: MANY and sometimes awkward things I hope you enjoy reading. 

- Turns out this "teacher" thing is way harder and way more expensive than advertised. I don't even want to tell you
A) how much money I have handed over to ETS in exchange for four hours of content testing, OR
B) what my once-idyllic spring break now looks like.
Sometimes I mantra "It's not about the destination, it's about the JOURNEY."  Right?  Of course it is.
Then in the back of my mind my little skeptic goes "BUT WHAT IF. What if this journey rounds the bend and it's nothing but kindergartners for miles.  Sticky fingered, snotting, crying, screaming, glue-eating kindergarteners."
For MILES.  What shoes do you even wear.

- I discovered something confusing about myself this weekend: this Republican. He does things to me.  Politically.
I feel dirty.

- My faculty adviser is kind of a hero of mine.  I found out last week she will cut you.
"This is not a master's thesis. Rewrite this and don't bring it back to me until it's a thesis.  Seriously, if you don't understand this [obscure grammar rule] go back to school, I mean REALLY."
Roger THAT.  Grad school, you guys.  It's the best.
So, um, that's what stands between me and graduating.  That and the French fluency exam of lore this Friday.

- The Power Squad saw this last week, but I wanted to share latest news with you guys:

This suggestion begs more questions than it answers.

• Is this a real dude?
• Probably not a real dude. Right? 
• I FB-searched to find out if it is a real name.  Because if it is on FB, it is (probably) real.
• IT IS A REAL NAME.   People have this name.
• Is it like Norwegian for "pancake"? Dutch for "sweater"?
• I checked my IKEA catalog and couldn't find it so ... not Finnish.
• Facebook has suggested I should be friends with him.
• What exactly about my profile screams I need "Nütsac" in my friends list?  It needs immediate rectifying.
• He was born in 1919. Strike 1 for "real person" argument.
• One of our mutual friends is Randall P. Earlock.  Um, strike 2?
• They've spoken.  Strikes three and four.
• I feel cheated.

It is sad how upset I was to discover this imaginariness.  I think we would have been good friends.

- I suspect this might be offensive, but I have no desire to see Avatar. Whatsoever.

Today's inspirational quote:
“If any vegans came over for dinner, I could whip them up a salad, then explain my philosophy on being a carnivore: If God had not intended for us to eat animals, how come He made them out of meat?”
- Sarah Palin, Going Rogue